Once in a while I get a great submission from a visitor. This is one of them. She is a Girl Guide Leader in Canada. Of course "potty talk" is the MOST popular subject around the campfire and "lat" duty is the LEAST popular job.
She shared with me their anthem. This is a great piece of singing!
(the chorus must be sung with extreme throaty gusto)
 SAM (Click the word "SAM" to hear the song)
Sam, Sam,
The Lavatory Man.
Scoop'n up the poop in the outhouse can.
(Chorus)
Toilet paper, Toilet paper, Paper towels!
Listen to the rhythm of the human bowels.
Goin down, down
under the ground,
Scoop'n up the poop that's float'n around.
(Chorus)
Toilet paper, Toilet paper, Paper Towels!
Listen to the rhythm of the human bowels.
(make hearty fart sounds to end)
This just in! Here is another verse from a visitor to the website:
"I just read with great interest the submission with the words to the song Sam, Sam the lavatory man.
My father had another verse to this song, which went:
Sam, Sam the lavatory man
He's the leader of the outhouse band
He passes out the paper and he passes out the towels
And he listens for the movement of another man's bowels
(Insert farting sounds)"
and here is yet another verse sent in from a visitor:
Sam, Sam, lavatory man,
chief inspector of the outhouse clan.
The issues, the tissues, the paper and the towels,
and listen to the sound of the rumbling bowels.
Down, down, down beneath the ground,
where all the little poopies are swimming around.
There sits Sam, lavatory man,
scoopin' up the poopies,
scoopin' up the poopies,
scoopin' up the poopies in a little tin can.
and here is yet another verse sent in from a visitor:
Sam, Sam, the lavatory man...
All time king of the outdoor can
Issues the tissues and hands out the towels...
And listens to the rumblings of the human bowels!
Down, down, underneath the ground...
Big ones, small ones, floating all around.
Constipated logs in a yellow sea!
Sam is the keeper of the can and me!
and here is yet another verse sent in from a visitor (at this rate, the song will last 30 minutes!):
Deep down, way under ground,
Walkin’ with the brown logs floatin’ around,
Splish, splash, all over your shoes,
While singin’ the outhouse blues
and here are yet another couple verses sent in from another visitor:
Sam, Sam the lavatory man
Chief inspector of the outhouse can.
He issues tissues, papers and towels
listens to the sounds of the human bowels.
Deep, deep, deep beneath the ground
all the little poopsies floatin' all around
and here comes Sam the Lavatory man
scoopin' up the poopsies with his little tin can.
Here's yet another verse!
Deep down, way under ground,
Walkin’ with the brown logs floatin’ around,
Splish, splash, all over your shoes,
While singin’ the outhouse blues
Hmmmm, More verses from visitors:
Sam, Sam the lavatory man
Chief inspector of the outhouse can.
He issues tissues, papers and towels
listens to the sounds of the human bowels.
Deep, deep, deep beneath the ground
all the little poopsies floatin' all around
and here comes Sam the Lavatory man
scoopin' up the poopsies with his little tin can.
Here's yet another verse!
My 97 year old mother heard the song, "Sam, Sam, the Lavatory Man" sung in 1936 or 1937 as well as having heard "Facinating Bitch" in the same time frame.
She knew one verse to "Sam, Sam" that wasn't mentioned on your site which is:
"Kak Ka on the undershirt
and Kak Ka on the shoes,
Now that's what I call
the crapping can blues."
New verses as of April 2008 from Suzann!
Here's the version my dad taught me when I was a kid....
Sam, Sam, the Outhouse Man.
Assistant Superintendent of the Outhouse Clan.
He passes out the papers, and serves the towels...
And listens to the rumble of everybody's bowels.
Now deep down, under the ground,
He can hear those turdies come a tumble-ling down.
Flip, Flop, You can hear them plop!
You got the Out House Blues.
New verse as of December 2010 from Nicholas Dykema from Canfield, Ohio
He says "One of my closest friends in grade school, 1940 - 1946, was Sam Drake, & to express the supportive bonds of our friendship, we used to sing this to him:"
Sam, Sam, the lavatory man,
He takes care of the crapping can,
He hands out papers and he hands out towels,
'Cause he loves to hear the rumble of another man's bowels.
"We thought it hilarious. Sam didn't. I haven't spoken to him in about 60 years. I wonder if he still doesn't? If you read this Sam, drop me a line."
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